rage, a story for calm

The tips of my fingers start to tingle, words get stuck in my throat, i get goosebumps in anticipation, suddenly i feel braver and everything else seems totally under my control. The fear is gone, and i feel my body taking over from my mind. At that very point, it all just stops. I can breath again, can see clearly and just stop and think clearly again, no, no mistakes this time.

We define humans as being a species of animal also. We say that we also have likeness to instincts which can be found in our genetic make-up. We have numerous glands which produce hormones in our bodies to exhibit different modes such as the release of adrenalin when our body goes into flight mode (requires increased strength, concentration, breathing etc). These reactions occur mostly on a subconscious level, and we do act on this. We get into physical fights, arguments and we do things which we usually regret later.

These things which we regret range from mild to insane. Mild would be using harsh words on a person which after a while when you think back, you regret saying certain words that you wouldn't have. Some people refer this as being the 'heat of the moment'. Clearly from experience we know that this is a point where we loose control to an extent on our faculties and do things we are not always fully aware of until it is done. An insane example would be the point where we perhaps kill a person or multiple people.

I feel that in every case that we face, we always have a choice, or choices to make. We make these choices weighing our options like on a balance scale and give preference to the one that we feel tips that scale. The difference when we do things before we think and when we choose to think first properly before we do something is this point. When we are angry and we have raging feelings building inside yourself, we tend to do what makes us feel better at the time instead of thinking logically and choosing the right path.

Sometimes we may feel that we don't have control over ourselves at this point, but i rather think that we don't want to rather. I have been in this kind of situation a few times and i know the intoxicating feeling of giving in to letting go and coming out on top, but i soon also realized that we can have control over ourselves and the way is to think what it would be like in such scenarios before we get into them.

I also sometimes feel that i lack the ability to react to things enough because i choose to think about it first, and more often than not, i choose to let things slide as the option to live life the way i want it out weighs most of my other choices.

Perhaps you may find yourself loosing control because it feels good, or you are always on the edge.I think that finding something you can use to tip the scales that make you see that there is something worth more than fighting.

"My secret is... i am always angry"  - everything has a solution, even if you may not be able to find it doesn't mean it does not exist!